and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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