Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
