I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Randomize
