school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
