She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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