I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Randomize
