I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
