He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
