I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
