A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
