Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
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