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I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
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