I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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