thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Randomize
