when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Randomize
