You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
So many bounce houses so little time
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
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