I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
She said her name was "party"
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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