dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
