just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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