You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
