sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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