let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
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it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
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