but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize