Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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