he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
3 2 1 whiskey
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
