"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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