I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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