if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Randomize
