the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
This is classic penis vs brain.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
