Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize