Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Everybody was literally kung fu fighting

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  (803): Everybody was literally kung fu fighting http://tfl.nu/75ca
  Replies (33) Good night (10795) Bad night (1077)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.

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  (970): Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass. http://tfl.nu/mex7
  Replies (12) Good night (9794) Bad night (1003)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement

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  (443): i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement http://tfl.nu/03ue
  Replies (8) Good night (4027) Bad night (1386)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.

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  (541): It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home. http://tfl.nu/scuu
  Replies (13) Good night (4192) Bad night (1291)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.

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  (740): If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure. http://tfl.nu/7lqe
  Replies (5) Good night (2055) Bad night (1178)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.

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  (734): In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER. http://tfl.nu/mukx
  Replies (10) Good night (2418) Bad night (861)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.

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  (616): He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk. http://tfl.nu/c5ac
  Replies (4) Good night (641) Bad night (1382)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.

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  (520): i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate. http://tfl.nu/utjt
  Replies (8) Good night (1474) Bad night (581)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods

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  (205): This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods http://tfl.nu/4tdp
  Replies (5) Good night (689) Bad night (461)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.

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  (954): All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me. http://tfl.nu/3tzi
  Replies (1) Good night (587) Bad night (363)
• Favorite

  (956): View more from Texas

  Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.

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  (956): Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair. http://tfl.nu/7p18
  Replies (1) Good night (628) Bad night (444)
• Favorite

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with

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  (606): So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with http://tfl.nu/4l7x
  Replies (1) Good night (328) Bad night (535)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep

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  (519): he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep http://tfl.nu/4w4n
  Replies (2) Good night (577) Bad night (203)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.

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  (317): IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS. http://tfl.nu/accm
  Replies (3) Good night (661) Bad night (176)
• Favorite

  (229): View more from Georgia

  Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.

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  (229): Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings. http://tfl.nu/e8bt
  Replies (1) Good night (337) Bad night (176)

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