I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
tell me about the fingering
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