how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
