It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize