so explain again why im purple
no
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Randomize
