my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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