I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
