direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize