is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
