I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
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i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
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Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz