never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
