her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
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