but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
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