omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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