I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
