Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I could fuck to npr.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
