I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!