Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
