You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
