:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
